Love, Where is your Fire?

Love, where is your fire?
Where is the passion that once burned?
Where is the ignited heart that always spoke?
I fear they have gone missing amongst other flames...

A heart so fragile,
made so fragile because of the burns,
because of the willing victimization.

Scars embedded so deep,
beyond the subcutaneous layer
penetrating the soul of the foregone.

Love, where is your fire?
Why do you insist on letting the flame burn?
It is on the brink of death,
leaving nothing but fading wisps in the air,
but you can't--you won't--let it burn to the end.

My hands, once so soft and warm,
are now hands burned to the bone,
with wounds that just won't heal.

There is but one ember winking in the fireplace;
almost mockingly, it winks,
brightens, and dims,
saving itself for the last inch of my skin,

making sure I am blackened like coal.

Rain

As the raindrops slowly fall,
gradually accumulating on the once-dry cement floor,
memories of the past slowly wet my mind,
inhibiting my thoughts from grasping the present reality.

As the raindrops first begin,
unknowingly clustering as an empty mass above my head,
my eyes close
and my face welcomes their stain on my skin.

I am
Saturated,
Consumed,
and the stains begin to feel my own.
But I urge myself to head home.

And yet,
as the raindrops
.`.`.`.`.gently.`.`
.`.`.`.slither.`.`.`
.`.`.`.`.down.`.`.`.`
`.`.`.`.the.`.`.`.`.
.`.`.`.`.`.window`.`.,
forming families every now and then only to

B UR ST

and

s e p a r a t e
from how saturated
they have become,

my hands writhe against the cold table,
itching for an escape.


It was inevitable.

And no roof could ever prevent their seeping presence.

Jealousy

(written April 19, 2011)

A rage of passions deep within
that not even time can keep caged in.
These feelings and thoughts are riddled of sin,
and can't be drowned with bottles of gin.
If only trust could be acquired again,
then the pangs of angst could cease to exist,
and then maybe,
the violent words could be stifled, muted, hidden...

Faithful in heart, and yet, this jealousy fit
has left only ice cold empty bitterness.
Where can the tiny bulb of love blossom?
Where are those delicate lips that have chosen.. to lie?
Lips so desirable, but only to lies.
Fibs so unbearable, dismissed by disguise,
and all the while, there exists a never-ceasing ringing
warning your thrusting hips to stop singing
the song so loved by the faithful heart,
because that once perfect melody has been torn apart.

There are only Spoken words embodying a Possible Beauty,
and possibly another forgiving opportunity...
But the repeated apologies
are now thrown to the side,
resembling only a broken hand
of a second in time.

This Journey of Mine

I was slowly sinking into endless blackness,
heading for a road of dark and dim despair...
I felt like I had caged myself in,
sittin' and chillin' as I was sinnin',
and my mind went numb, my body caved in,
and something evil took over.
I was now somewhere I had never been.
So unhappy, so far away from the light, and
I went crazy , my mind raced with fear and and thought of no escape,
I had no ability to understand what was happening,
but all I knew was that I desperately wanted out,
tobefreefromthisthingthatwastryingtotake me.

As I cried inside and begged to have control again,
that was when, like a hand from above,
He spoke to me.
He held me.
He held me close to His heart and said that I would be okay.
He told me that I could choose the darkness or the light,
and I eagerly reached for the hopeful light,
and my eyes forever shut out the darkness.
I finally see with clarity how this journey goes,
and
My feet have been planted firmly on this road before me,
and with the light to guide me, I can start this new year of life--
this new year that I have been so mercifully blessed with.

I promise to never go back to the darkness.

Sweet Water,
Oh Sweet Water. You are always what I have needed.

And I thank that Hand for reaching out to me,
for helping me get up and keep walking.