Salty Gravity

excuses
harbored beneath my eyes
"I'm sorry I'm not what you want"

days
seem to slip between our hands
"I'm sorry I can't change the past"

salt
flowing,
unceasing,
pulled by gravity
"I try but you keep
pushing me away....."

down,
it lingers,
nestled in the pores of my face
but gravity always wins.
it rests untouched,
but only for a moment..

my hands
ascend with hope,
hoping to find solidarity,
only to find the salt dancing among black smears.
these streaks now pressed against my cheeks,
and my fingers feel the weight of gravity,
and despair,
as they are pulled violently back down to the concrete.

"Every weekend its the same sad story"

Where I'm coming from

I am from a broken heart,

From a man with no name and no face. 

I am from the balance between life and death,

From a miracle that kept fighting against all odds.

I am from a home of premature faiths,

And loud disagreements.

I am from halal and kebobs,

And  arroz con leche.

From "Mash'Allah" 

and "Si, se puede!"

From undecipherable Marks and 

sixty-six love Letters.

I am from tightly interlaced fingers

And reverent closed eyes.
I am from ears that were first opened
to the sound of fatherly love
after eighteen years of silence. 

I am from music notes and careful words,

From colorful impulsivity and

repentant recollection.

I am from Hands that kept molding

And keep holding me in one piece.

I am from the hood,

From red and blue flashing lights,

from accidents on purpose, 

from stolen wombs 

and blood on white 

December nights.

I am from gunshots and

scarred wrists, 

from open arms and innocent dreams

on cold and gritty New York streets.

I am from lost fantasies and better realities

From depression and from Hope;

I AM from Love.

I am from Peace.


*this poem inspired this song:

Bonfire

the flames speak of pride
burning bright and mighty,
growing with each breath...
but it is ephemeral.
the licks of life shine briefly,
for quickly, they return to ashes.
in reverence of their sanguine existence,
they whisper their heated tales
for but a few moments longer, and
I trace my fingers through
the final wisps and inhale, deeply.

Fireflies

The last time I saw fireflies was on a still summer night
walking home from all the mess we made,
thinking how will my life be after all this pain
that has stained
my path?
and our memories replayed
and I was reminiscing on your eyes and how healing from their cutting gaze
has been exponentially delayed.
I was deep in thought but then I was caught off guard;
I took it as a hopeful sign from God--because as I walked
through the dark,
I could see a glow from the corner of my eye
and when I focused more, I saw them--about seven fireflies,
shining in and out of existence.
And I was instantly reminded that hope requires persistence,
that no instance of depression or any lowly heartless position
could ever take away my hope...
Because it is in the most quietest moments of my soul
that a light is lit within,
always helping me get safely home.

Departed

the living
walking
among the dead
snap
snap
snap
a picture
caught eternally as a frozen
moment
as they lie below
eternally asleep
as children laugh and frolick
above and through their
departed memories
and meek eulogies
on tombstones, so gray and cold.

Maybe, Just Maybe

Oh, why do I give him a single moment of my time?

My God, It’s crazy how he’s running through my mind!

And I know it’s foolish considering all of the pain

And the hurt that he left me here with, it’s always the same

and after all this time

my heart wants me to find you and let you know I still love you

but my strength wont let me fall back down to you

cause I have changed so much

I have become so tough

Overcoming all our love

I now know that God is Enough

The only One I can trust

And I pray for you so much

But with no contact

I only wonder if the devil has attacked

You, broken you, back, down and won

Or if you have changed too

And are willing to live in the Son

Maybe with time, we can forgive and forget

Maybe with love, we can erase the regret

Maybe, just maybe

But I don’t want to live in disillusions

Because I know true love is only an illusion—

No one is perfect, we all make mistakes

But why did we have to end it this way?

I want to know

If maybe, just maybe,

This still matters to you?

Does your heart still whisper “I love you”?

But more than that,

I want to know if you are safe.

Are you embracing the Sun?

Maybe, just maybe.

I hope the Light has won.

Like A Soldier

You want a Relevant element

 I’m Dependent on the Sacrament

There’s just no comparison

my greatest weapon of self-defense

Im callin your bluff and its

It’s time to heal ya sin we’re exposin’ it

Your Phenomenal reticence

Longs for Innocence so adamant

And so we’re killin em drainin em

Slowly like a titanium

Bomb to the bottom

We tellin ‘em about Him

Lost souls we go get’em

Bring’em to the Throne of our Father

That’s why I’m his daughter

Reel ‘em in like a soldier

As your soul fights for exposure

The toll’s that of the greatest war ya

Will ever fight in your life

Its always a struggle and it startin’ tonight

and when you wake in the morning

and you feel the tug of the callin’

dont run from it applaud it

cause every soul will get audited

so your faith, don’t renounce it

better yet embrace it 

dont let your life get wasted

so when it’s the last call 

and ur friends are makin jokes

faith hope n love are all 

that will be left, nothing else, 

that’s all folks!

Echoes

a pin drops

my heart stops

its true talk

the real cost

of life bought

and lied against

a broken pavement

cracked and bent

disillusory trick

heat escapes quick

and the sound of hope

trickles

if we elope 

in wrinkles

to a time that we'd know

but all that's left are echoes

empty in my soul

*check out this song too: 

If Reality Knocks

if a tree falls in the middle of
an unpopulated area
and so then no one is around to hear it--no one perhaps except God--
does the tree actually fall?

perception
or
deception?

either way,
i'm here,
thinking and riddling the hours away
trying to figure out how to get your memory
as far away from me as possible..
knock knock
who is there?
always you.
always.

so,
if i am thinking about you
in an unpopulated area
alone in my room, where only God can hear my thoughts,
do you feel me thinking about you?
do you get the notion that i miss you/
do you realize love doesn't die?

so,
if i am thinking about you
and no one is around,
can you hear my heart through the miles in between?

i just want to know,
in a silent prayer,
do you think about me too?
and not in a way that just recognizes my existence,
but,
do you really truly think about me?

knock knock
who is it?
reality.
oh, thank you for stopping by.

Streets of Gold (original song)

Commissioned (original rap)

I am Second (original rap)

Stripped Away

A youth stripped away from his future;

Only twenty years old ,

crossing a creek of waters so cold,

drowning during his final adventure.

And the world goes on—

The plights and fights

Of love gone wrong,

When all that really matters is life,

Not the location of the party tonight,

or the whore you wouldn't dare dream of making your wife.

Death doesn’t discriminate

On gender, religion, race, or age.

When your time comes, you will come

Face to face 

With the Truth.

Will you know what to say in your final hour?

Will you be prepared in the proper armor?

A youth dancing with fire 

instead of planning for the future

Is Death’s favorite playground.

Get close enough and you burn,

stripped, naked and exposed. 

The young are so naïve sometimes,

Unaware, thinking that they have no ties

To the ground,

because their minds are 

always floating through the clouds.

But Death loves to surprise

And loves to visit in disguise.

As the angels' sorrows slowly rise,

The heavens open up and cry;

And although we may inherit the Kingdom

Too many have no care for it, nor its freedom,

Thinking there’s no chance they will die.  

Oh, but they continue to flirt with puppet-like lies

and blind away the life from their own eyes.

It is sad.

It is done.

A youth stripped away of his future,

while the remaining continue on. 

Pierce our hearts, 

O Mercy Divine. 

Words of Life

speak words of life! 
words that are 
reflective, positive, and encouraging. 
help build a house of love! 
refrain from the unkind,
harsh and discouraging banter. 


your words are one of your
strongest tools 
and should be utilized fully.
your words have the power
to build someone up 
so help build them up to be 
everything they are meant to be.


your words will have an effect.
make sure you are spreading love

hope

and faith.

for they will always remain.

Stardust

On that daily grind it's hard to find that peace of mind 
My steps may waver but His Love doesn't falter

He's the Sun. The brightest star like a superstar where we are just .. stardust.

And I must confess my lust for the approval of the world, 
it's in my nature as a girl, as a human, as a child, 
But if you've heard, He is Lord, and His Love is above the laws of this world. He is wild-ly and surprisingly constant. 
It's irrelevant if we've been hesitant cause He is adamant about His hate for sin, 
but He has forgiven every last offense if you seek repentance sincerely, 
do you hear me?

He's the Sun. The brightest star like a superstar and we are just .. stardust.

Yet like the dust and clay we were made to briefly stay, ephemeral.
Fleeting moments, trying to evade the fact that He has the final say, for He is eternal. 
Now, I was just a mess and my consciousness would not let Him in
When all I craved was freedom from hurt and sin

And I've heard about this man named Jesus
And how he came from the heavens to free us
But that was more than two thousand years ago.
I denied His impact on this heart 
that was desperately seeking a jumpstart.
But the more I sought for truth in the swerving youth 
that bought the lies of society 
The more I began to see 
that love was nowhere to be found.
And I helplessly cried and told myself "I'd be alright" , 
I wouldn't get jaded with the weighted burdens all around.
But when all you see is pain and all you hear is hate
its hard to elaborate on what it means to be loved.
But when I looked above I could always still see the sun.

He's the Son. The brightest star like a superstar where we are His stardust.

You are Everything (original song)

                                                            original song by me. inspired by God's unconditional Love.


Verse: You are Everything (4x)

Chorus (2x)
You are the reason that I sing
You are everything to me
You are everything I needYou, You, oh You, Lord 

Bridge (2x)
The AIR I breathe
The LOVE I speak
The LIFE in me
It's YOU, It's You♥ 
Oh, Lord, 
You're Everything

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

original song by Stephanie T. Villeda. inspired by God's Unconditional Love.

CHORUS

Hallelujah, Hallelujah, He reigns, He reigns.

Pouring out Love every Second that He claims, He claims.

Hallelujah, Hallelujah, He reigns, He reigns.

Nothing Greater than the Glory of His Name, His Name.



VERSE 1

No matter what I been through, Or where I've been Hiding

No matter any ache or pain, I can survive it

I can rise above it, I'm no longer a puppet

No longer tied down to negative strings,

I've got the hint,

He pulls on the Love strings, of my Heart,

And that's why I got an unbelievable New Start.

My life before just can't compare to this

Unbelievable Bliss

He struck a chord so Strong that I can't Resist.

Redeemed from my past, I can sing again out loud,

Nothing to hold me down, no longer lonely in a crowd,

All shadows cast aside, I've been saved and I survive,

I've been given a Brand. New. Life.



CHORUS



VERSE 2

He's sent me angels during my darkest hour,

Gave me courage and power, When I thought I was weak,

But His Love, ALWAYS NEAR, is one I can always keep.

Never abandoned

I've been enlightened,

Shown the true meaning of the meaning of life and

I'm forever grateful 'cause now life is beautiful.

And even though I walk through the valley of death,

He is My Breath,

The beat in my chest,

the pounce of my steps,

guides me from East to West,

moving me towards my Best,

and His Love doesn't Rest?

What could be greater than this??

Like a Warm Hug or a Soft Kiss,

He gives what I need when I need Him most,

With God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost,

Love is patient, Love is Kind, never envies, never boasts,



A perfect love more perfect than this could never exist!



BRIDGE

True, Hopeful, Never-Failing

Honest, sincere, always availing,

Humbler, Persistent, always prevailing,

His love is there for the taking and the sharing,

And that's simply why we sing cause He simply is amazing,

So let your soul rejoice in the Love that He's giving,

Cause we only get ONE life and that life is for LIVING.



CHORUS

Bright Eyed Boy

oh, 

it's the bright eyed boy 
with the smile on his heart, 
that makes mine beat fast...
he's got me thinkin' 'bout 
that thing 
and I can only hope this will last...
I can see so much beauty
within those eyes,

emanating from deep within...

this joy, our hearts,
how safely they shine,

I never thought I'd feel this again...

a man of devotion,

my expectations surpassed...

oh,

how I pray this will last.

Every time

Every time I wake,
the Sun sings to my soul and my soul sings praises to the Lord.
How grateful I am to rise yet again!

Every time I wake,
my bones become more brittle, my skin aging from their demands,
forever being reminded that I am human.
Every time I wake,
your face breaks through the light, haunting my thoughts,
and I am burdened by your memory.

Every time, I pray for the strength to get through another day.

Every time I take a step,
through the moments,
through the breaths,
through the thoughts,
through the dreams,
through the mists,
through the memories,
you are present, yet fleeting,
and I am left empty...

Every time,
I expect you to be there,
waiting for me on my way home...



What took you so long, my darling?



Every time, I pray for the strength to get through this day.







Sorry, I couldn't make it.
you  are alive, here, inside my heart,
yet here, in this outside world, you are nothing
but the reflection of the ghost of a man
I once knew...
Every time I close my eyes,
your image floats through my mind,
and I am left reaching out yet grasping only Air.
Everytime I close my eyes,
the storm is relentless within, the Winds piercing
and crushing my heart, yet I am almost to the shore.

Every time I close my eyes,
the stars inside my mind seem to whisper
louder than the sound of your silence, I am not alone.

Everytime, I pray for the strength to get through today.

stressing

the stress is compressing my chest
it's at it's best, this darkness won't rest; I need Your light to profess:
MY LIFE IS A MESS!
come fix me, rid me of this hex
cause what's next, just might slip...
right out of my hand
but you understand :
that true love is greater than good sex,
for intimacy with You knows no end,
for knowing truth leads to true happiness,
that beyond the grave, lies no more sadness;
that along the way, though I might break and cave,

You are the provider of strength to get me through these days,
Initiator of faith, the One that always remains.

You are the Reason why I raise any praise.
my soul longs for the promises You made
and clings to the love You've displayed,

but right now, I need You to heal me from the pain.
please, hear these pleas, and raise me from my grave.

trust, yes, I must, for I musn't delay,
I pray my plea is heard today ...

(hear the finalized version in song: Original Song: One Almighty [sorry for the poor quality]